


(Ich hab) Angst

by FatyGSquare



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Angst, Comfort, Other, the author has too many feels after GPF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-08
Updated: 2019-12-08
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:48:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21717145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FatyGSquare/pseuds/FatyGSquare
Summary: Alone with himselfA thousand things to think about.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 17





	(Ich hab) Angst

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Teeny tiny bit of whatever this is, because I have to many feels after GPF.
> 
> This one is set after the short, so yeah...
> 
> Inspired by LaFee’s song “Angst”. I hadn’t listened to that song in ages, but immediately after the short it came to my mind. Title also from that song

Yuzuru sits alone in his room, looking at the protocols he holds in his hand. He had been so sure, so confident that he could pull it off, get his crown back. And then that damned combination, which had been so consistent thus far. At the moment of truth, it failed him.

He cramps the paper to a ball with anger and throws it across the room. Who cares? It is always the same, it doesn’t matter how good he does, how spectacularly he skates, the scores wouldn’t have changed much. Certainly not enough to make up for that thirteen point gap.

Silver. It mocks him, taunts him with its coming presence. It knows it won’t be welcomed, it knowsjust how heavy its weight will feel around his neck, resting on his chest. It laughs at him.

_“You are not enough. You are not who you used to be. You are not the legend they think you are. You have become pathetic.”_

  
Stop!

His breathing is faster and faster, and he folds in on himself, trying to stop the prospect of another silver, another defeat.

By someone else. Someone he cannot being himself to consider a rival. A formidable opponent, yes.

But never a rival. Not like him.

Stop!

It will never happen again. He will never come back to the same ice, never return to dare Yuzuru to do better with each stroke of his blades, each beautiful Salchow, each encouraging look from the boards on his way out.

No hugs, no smiles, no constant presence.

He sobs once, twice and breaks down, crying silently, muffling the sound with his hands.

He will never admit it in public, he will never tell others, but fear consumes him. It has since rumors started flying about the retirement.

And it has plagued him, this new constant in his life.

Because he hates changes, big changes like that one. Disruptive to his carefully planned routine, they throw him off balance.

Alone, he fears he will never be enough again.

Alone, he wonders who he is.

Alone, he questions what he truly wants.

His phone pings. New notification. A message. He gasps.

With shaky hands, he takes the device and unlocks it. Two words. So simple yet so powerful.

_‘Vamos Yuzu.’_

He is still afraid, he still wonders if he’s enough.

But he is not alone.

Despite the distance.

Habi is there.

**Author's Note:**

> Liked it? Hated it? There are too more parts of this, one after the free and another one...  
> Kudos and comments are as always super welcomed!! 💜


End file.
